The Book

F*** It. Get A Divorce. The Guide for Optimists (FIGAD) is a smart, insightful guide for anyone in a marriage or long-term relationship contemplating a divorce or breakup. FIGAD provides an optimistic roadmap for the divorce-curious, offering tangible resources and exercises for self-assessment and reflection. Steve engages readers with cool humor and offers relevant and timeless wisdom on beginning again and a fresh, modern take on marriage, history, religion, spirituality and tradition. Armed with tools to navigate the divorce landscape, readers will walk away with a sense of empowerment to make the decision that’s best for them.

Hi, I’m Steve.

The author of F*** It. Get A Divorce.

A few years ago my marriage went sideways, and my ex and I both knew it, and we went through therapy and other avenues and ultimately made what we thought was the best decision, but was actually a horrible mistake: We stayed together.


Free Chapters

Staying in an unhappy relationship is a choice.

Maybe a good one. Maybe not.

But it’s almost never the only choice.



Reader Praise

“Steve Kane does a masterful job of showing that divorce does not have to be viewed as full-on failure. He reminds us of things that many of us know, but can easily forget due to outside pressures: 1. We should find a path to joy in our lives — and this path may require us to divorce our spouse, 2. Ending a marriage does not mean the end of family — there are many ways to be a family, 3. Ending a marriage does not have to be a “fight to the death” between the two parties, 4. if you manage your divorce with kindness and love, your kids will come out just fine.


This is a VERY DIFFERENT kind of “marriage” program — and a very welcome new perspective.”

“I highly recommend this program to anyone even remotely considering getting a divorce. It is a very practical and thoughtful guide to “consciously uncoupling” in as elegant and pain-free a manner as possible. From the title alone you know the author is blunt, funny, and bright. The program does not disappoint and I’d like to suggest makes a great gift (sent anonymously!) for anyone you know considering divorce.”

“This helped. Thank you Steven Kane. If you’re going through something, or might be going through something — I literally cannot recommend a better resource that is honest, raw, and smart. Buy this program.”

“An authentic, extremely well-written guide to a “scary” life event that ranks right up there with the birth of kids, the loss of a job and the death of loved ones. Here we gain a fresh, witty, hard-won perspective on how divorce can be healthy — how it can ultimately be a good/positive thing — for ALL involved. How many friends have you had who remain trapped in debilitating unhappiness for all the wrong reasons? “What will people think?” “What will happen to the family?” That’s the F-it part of this book … that’s the noise this book helps you cancel. If you or anyone you know is unhappy enough to consider divorce, Kane helps you cut through the clutter and find your way — and your spouse’s way, and your kids’ way — to a better, healthier place.”

“I happened to discover this program browsing and the title and images clearly garnered my attention ;-). It’s interesting as a divorcee, I decided to make the purchase. The reason is simple. I’ve often struggled with my, our divorce. It’s been the old “should have, would have, could have” mindset that has kept me from truly letting go for more years than I care to admit. Steve Kane’s honest and thoughtful approach and insights to dealing head on with one of the most difficult decisions we make in our lifetime has given me a surprisingly fresh perspective. I’m beginning to lighten up and accept the fact that was the right path. Thank you Steve!!!!!”